I have always had a tendency to not finish what I start. I go in full steam ahead and before long i've puttered out. But this was showing me so much more then just not finishing something. It was about not wanting to move on in my life. This little pile of papers was like the plug in the sink, I was deliberately not pulling the plug. I can feel how I was fighting making different choices because I was happy with my life as it was going. But my body was telling me something else. Because I was holding back in one part of my life I was holding back in every part of my life. I was starting to feel like I had locked myself in a cell, and I could feel when I looked in the mirror that I was not living my life instead I was hiding. I had lost the joy and sparkle that I once had. Then the other day I said to myself. Just start. If this is the thing I don't want to do more then anything else. Just go and do it. ( Interestingly enough this is what I say to clients, I will have to start listening to myself more.)
Day 4. There have been more days between these days then 1 day. I have been spending weeks were I could feel that I didn't want to go near my paper work, I have been doing everything instead of it. Avoiding going into the office. Ignoring the baskets. Moving them from one room to the next in order to not deal with what was coming up for me. I didn't want to feel what was going on.
I have always had a tendency to not finish what I start. I go in full steam ahead and before long i've puttered out. But this was showing me so much more then just not finishing something. It was about not wanting to move on in my life. This little pile of papers was like the plug in the sink, I was deliberately not pulling the plug. I can feel how I was fighting making different choices because I was happy with my life as it was going. But my body was telling me something else. Because I was holding back in one part of my life I was holding back in every part of my life. I was starting to feel like I had locked myself in a cell, and I could feel when I looked in the mirror that I was not living my life instead I was hiding. I had lost the joy and sparkle that I once had. Then the other day I said to myself. Just start. If this is the thing I don't want to do more then anything else. Just go and do it. ( Interestingly enough this is what I say to clients, I will have to start listening to myself more.)
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Day 3. How can I offer support to clients if I don't support myself. I felt this morning how I have always said to clients that we have to feel what is under clutter before we can let it go and move on. If we don't deal with whatever the issue is it will just reappear surfacing in a different way. What I discovered was that even though I have been saying this to others for years I was not really practising what I was preaching. I had only been prepared to go so far and then I would stop. I was not wanting to feel what it really was. So my paper work would never go away completely, it would just disappear for a while and then slowly resurface. When we truly allow ourselves to feel why we may be holding onto clutter and complicating our lives, we can then pull the plug on a dam we have been holding back maybe for years. Once we recognise our behaviours and make different choices we start to see the complication drop away and a simple way of living will surface.
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AuthorDenise works with people to support them to bring their true reflection to their homes, their clothes, their wardrobes and their lives. "Its so amazing to see the changes in people as they rediscover more of who they truly are." SUBSCRIBESubscribe to the blog to receive FREE tips to support you in your home. SUBSCRIBE
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